What do you take me for, a fool?
Or were you just too blind to see
That every effort made had failed
And there is no destroying me.







Yes, now what? Yesterday's wrong decision had let to these consequences. Ian was depressed until he was sick and not being able to come to school. Then, today's assembly, she announced that we should be recognised and hence they wanted to give us a special present. Now they still want us to be sent for competition. What is this? Why are they toying with our feelings? I cried yesterday night and only managed to sleep for three hours.


I was thinking about all the hard work and effort we had put in, which all had sort of gone down the drain. Although we had got in the competition, but what's the point? They sent 1L as well. What are they thinking? Shouldn't 1F be so much better? Its just because the narrator was a bloody extrovert bitch.


Sharlene said that they had given us a chance and they tried to replace our disappointments, what else could we expect? Okay, she has a point. And today, someone told me that here was this bloody freaking guy in our class who said that we had let the class lost their face. At first in school i was thinking that if all these things were so easy, then he should go and do himself.



Does he know that how does it feel to stand on the stage, facing all the Sec 1? Does he know that how much effort we had put in together in order to win the competition, so that teachers will not look down on 1H anymore because of him? Does he know all the work we had done? Does he know how much time we had spent rehearsing and practicing all day?
All the answers are freaking NO.


But at home, i was realising that, maybe he was correct, maybe it's a fact, maybe i had really let the class down. Others classes saw me crying, and after today about the dramatisation thing, rumours had spread and said that i wanted teachers to pity on my crew and allowing us to go into the final competition.


What the fuck. Please, thirteen years olds but as if were primary school students. Childish thinking way. But whatever you all may think, i dont care. If you said i cried because of that, then, go ahead. I wont get affected by anyth. I think that i got the whole thing wrong. Shouldn't blame her for that. She actually spoke up for us. Anyhow, I dont feel like going into the final competition. But, i dont want the whole crew to be affected by me just because i dont feel like going. As long as everyone is happy, i am as well.


Blood still stain my hands. Sharpening my senses on the outside.